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15 First Date Signals That Say He Is Interested In You!
It’s no secret by now that I am not an advocate of persuading, manipulating and chasing after people to make them love us. There is nothing men find more putting off than a woman who repeatedly calls begging for time and attention. Even if he initially liked you, “chasing” after him will put him off.
It’s best to know and look for some common clues that tell you he is interested in you. That way you don’t make a fool of yourself or completely kill even the little spark that with a little nurturing might have become a flame!
Here are just 15 of common clues that say he is interested:
1. He voluntarily turns off his cell phone and/or text pager so that you two won’t be interrupted.
2. He keeps steady eye contact (those soulful gazes) and smiles at you – a lot.
3. He presents himself as more than a friendly person, but as a person who is interested in you as a potential lover.
4. He compliments your appearance, not in a general way like “you look good” but something very specific like “I like your eyes/hair/skin etc).
5. He is playful with you: teases, entices, provokes, poses challenges – anything which implies he’s seducing you and inviting you to “mess about” in the realm of reciprocal uncertainty. I am not talking sex here, seduction is not always about sex.
6. He finds excuses (accidental or otherwise) to touch you on the arm (helping you up the stairs), lower back (guiding you to the table) shoulder (checking if you are warm enough) etc. Just any excuse to touch you.
7. He is interested in talking to you – and that includes his body language is slightly leaning forward towards you. He looks animated and genuinely happy to be talking to you and not scanning the room for other “prey”.
8. Asks questions about you, your life, your work, your passions, your childhood (or child/children if you have any), your dreams, your favorite color etc.
9. Listens attentively and remembers what you say. If he’s listening you’ll find him repeating some of the things you’ve said to ask more questions. You’ll also notice that he’s using some of your own expressions and phrases – it’s called mirroring.
10. Openly shares information about his life; directly and honestly answers your questions. This is not the same as “pouring his emotional problems on your laps.” It should be clear he is interested in you as a ‘love interest” not a therapist.
11. He makes reference to something happening “next time” or directly ask you early on in the date if you are free on day this or that to do this or that.
12. He doesn’t just say goodbye and takes off but lingers a bit probably hoping for a kiss, but not wanting to mess things up by being too forward.
13. Tries to extend the date by asking if you’d like to go somewhere for coffee or asks you to share a nightcap (his place, your place wherever). It just shows he can’t get enough of you.
14. Calls you the same night or the very next day after the date just to say he had a great time.
15. Asks you out again on a date within a few days – anything that looks like he wants to keep you busy so you are off the market.
Truth be told, when a man is interested in you, he will make his interest known in more ways than you can count. That’s just how men are. Correction. That’s just how REAL men are.
If you are already dating someone you might also want to look at my article 10 Warning signs you are not being loved enough. If you are always trying to persuade or chase after someone, you will find on my website invaluable insight into choosing the “right” people, including separating high-potential dates from energy drainers, types of relationships that will not last long, how to identify who is capable of give and take relationships, etc. My desire is for all of us to be able to choose partners we can have the pleasure of “playing” with rather than against or playing for.
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